Fun-opsis December 10th- Imam ka Dhamaal Episode!

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Fun-Opsis December 10, 2012 Episode

SUBAH  9.30 BAJE

Yahaan Rajeev aur Niketan, Imam Siddique se baatein kar rahe hain!

RAJEEV: Imam Bhai, aap meri baat naheen samajh rahe.  I know ki Delu says it is all over, but, mera Dil naheen manta Imam Bhai, you know its easy for me to settle down with a young girl, but Delu? Delu ka kya hoga Imam Bhai? ----Delu is 40 plus, uske liye easy naheen hai naa----



IMAM: Oh hello 40 Plus ke brand Ambassador!----- Ye Ajanta Pharma ne naya product nikaala hai kya Mardaangi ki Haivaangi badaane ke liye? 30 Plus ke baad?-----------That settled. Listen! First you stop calling me a BHAI. Main aapka Bhai-Vaai naheen hoon. Kya hota hai Bhai? Hain? Kya Hota hai? Dawood Bhai? UP-Bihar Ka Bhai? Mazzzaq bana ke rakh diya hai Bhai lafz ka----

RAJEEV: Wo, sorry, main---



IMAM: Bas? Quatal kar do, Sorry bol do! Ye acchha hai? Saale, Angrez chale gaye ye do lafz chhod gaye Hindustaan ki vaat lagaane ke liye! PLEASE aur SORRY!---Main aapka band bajaana chaahta hoon, bajaane do PLEASE! ---Maine aapka band baja diya, SORRY. Acchha hai ye? Hai ki naheen, hai ki naheen?

RAJEEV (Helplessly looks towards Niketan): Yaar ye kya hai, ye toh---.

IMAM: Oh hello! When I am talking to you, basic tehzeeb honi chaahiye aap mein ------look into my eyes-----meri aankhon mein dekhiye, did you get that? MERI AANKHON MEIN DEKHIYE AAP -----

RAJEEV: Sorry wo---

IMAM: Phir wohi baat? Allah kasam, ye SORRY aapki jaan leke rahega ek din Mr. Rajeev Paul! 'You know whats your problem? Do you know that? 'IT IS THIS WORD SORRY!----Sorry Delu, sabzi mein namak jyaada pad gaya, Sorry Delu Roti jal gayi, Sorry Delu, maine Jhaadu theek se naheen lagaaya ------Ye Sorry Delu, Sorry Delu ne aapki shakal ko bana diya hai, one huge SORRY!-------aur khud kabhi Delu ki shakal pe gaur kiya hai aapne? Hain??----Yeda ban ke Peda khaate-khaate, khud Mathura ka Desi Ghee ka Peda lagti hai wo------


NIKETAN (suppresses smile at Rajeev's plight):  Imam bro, aap kuchh jyaada hi harsh ho rahe hain Rajeev pe!



IMAM: Mr. Niketan Madhok!----- Pehle toh aap hansna band keejiye! -------I am an Image make over specialist. -------Stars ki image banaata hoon main and you know your problem?--------- This LAUGH of yours! --------Hanste ho, toh aankhein poori band ho jaati hain aur model naheen, Saste Chinese Khilone lagte ho aap...jaise koi Chinese Boodha insaan khil-khila ke hans raha ho----! ---------Ok, pehle hansna band karo----absolutely band karo ye Khee-Khee-Khee-Khee!-----Aap dono ko shaayad andaaza bhi naheen hai, kaise jhel raha hoon main aap dono ko is ghar mein!

RAJEEV: Imam Ji, aap hum dono ko beshaq jhel rahe hain, magar Main aapko yakeen dilana chaahte hoon, ki hum dono aapke saath bahut khushi se reh rahe hain, no seriously!

IMAM: Ye-Ye-Ye! Yehi aapki problem hai Beta! Fourteen years, -----Chaudah saal, agar aap roz aapki Delu ko yehi baat naheen bolte, toh aaj aapka uzda hua chaman aabaad hota, usmein ek aapko samjhne waali ghar-waali hoti---magar naheen? 14 saal aapne Jahannum mein bitaaye'Narak mein guzzare aur roz kya bola unko??? (makes faces)------ Delu, Main aapke saath bahut khush hoon!!!------Jaise Delu ke saath 14 saal bitaaye, mere saath bhi 14 Hafte kaat hi loge! --------Arey tumhaari shakal pe SORRY chhapa hua hai bhaiyya!----------and stop showing that Cleavage of yours. Maine Salman Khan ko bhi bola thha, I hate your cleavage show-----------..go, cover it with one of the stoles I brought for you, go-----go I say----------shooo---huttt!
 

DOPAHAR 03.45 BAJE:
Yahaan Imam swimming pool ke aage baithe hain aur apne aap se baatein kar rahe hain!

IMAM: Ya Khuda, kin Zaahilon ke beech fansa diya mujhko'.kaisa Imtehaan le raha hai mere Sabar ka Mere Maula----

Sapna sneaks in from behind and places both her palms on Imam's eyes so that Imam can guess who it is!

IMAM: Kasam Khuda ki Rajeev, Chichhori Harkatein mat karo! -----Mujhe pehle din se tum par shaque hai aur mujhe tum mein koi dilchaspi naheen hai!----Niketan hota toh shaayad main soch bhi leta, but tum? Chhee! Thhooo!

SAPNA (removes her hands and starts jumping up and down, excitedly singing): Ullu banaaya, bada maza aaya, Ullu banaaya, bada maza aaya! Ullu--

IMAM: Aap mujhe maaf karein Sapna ji,------ but poore adab aur tehzeeb ke saath, hum aapse kehna chaahte hain ki is waqt aap lag rahi hain, Himalayas ki ghaatiyon mein paaya jaane waala, -----Safed khopdi waala ULLU!

SAPNA: Whaaahttt? How dare you?



IMAM: Dare-bare ki baat hum aapse naa hi karein toh accha hai! Aadmi kabhi Ullu ban sakta hai? Aap ki baat sun ke Darwin bhi apni kabar mein Ultiyaan kar raha hoga! Aur agar aadmi Ullu naheen ban sakta, toh maza kahaan se aa sakta hai? Hain? -----Pehle toh aap apne baal kaale keejiye. ------Naheen seriously. Aathvein darze (8^th class) ki Science class mein Imam Siddique ko padhaaya gaya thha, ki Sooraj ki Roshni sabse badhiya kale rang mein absorb hoti hai!---Ye aapke safed baal, Sun light ko reflect kar dete hain-----Jab dimaag mein garmi hi naheen pahunchegi toh Aadmi aapko Ullu hi nazar aayega aur faaltoo baaton mein faaltoo maza aayega-----.

SAPNA: Yuckk! You are disgusting! -----------(Starts talking to some one in air)--------Lady ke saath kaise baat karna hai, ----Lady ke saath kaise baat karna hai------is aadmi ko koi manners hi naheen hai! How disgusting!

IMAM: Aap mujhse baat kar rahi hain?---- Mujhse? Toh hawa mein Bhoot-Preit-Jinnaton se baatein karna band keejiye.------ Look in my eyes, meri aankhon mein dekhiye.-------- Yehi tameez hai aapki? Doosron ke Baal baad mein kaatiye, pehle apni image theek keejiye. ----------I am an Image make over consultant!-----Urvashi ko bhaga diya thha maine,------ but aapki Image zaroor badal doonga main!----REVLON ka Black Hair Color- Conditioner leke aayiye and lets get started!

Sapna gives one full of hatred glance at Imam Siddique and bursts out crying----